Welcome to the Weekend Watch. Where we try to point you towards the best ways to spend your viewing time (or, at least, steer you clear of the garbage).
Crazy Rich Asians
Loren: It’s great to see a whole cast of Asian actors in not a martial arts movie. The downside here is that this plot looks pretty standard to say the least. Couple that with the media blitz and the mid-August release and I don’t think I’ll be in for this one.
Rick: Definitely breaking a lot of ground for underrepresented Asian performers, but it looks like a pretty standard romantic comedy. There really isn’t any competition this weekend and, given the popularity of the novel, it’ll probably do well. I, however, am out.
Loren: The first trailer I saw for this was terrible and creepily jingoistic. This leans much more into a paramilitary 16 Blocks. I’m not a huge Mark Wahlberg fan but I love Iko Uwais (The Raid) who I didn’t realize was in this. That’s gonna get me to see it, but definitely not in the theater.
Rick: So, it’s basically 16 Blocks, but more explodey. I’m okay with that. Not opening weekend, but maybe a couple of weeks in when I need an action fix.
Loren: I love dogs. But I don’t need to see this as a dramatization. It’s a prehistoric story of a boy and his dog. Got it.
Rick: Wait. He fell what looks like ten stories and just broke his ankle? GTFO. Also, this looks like a more self-serious version of 10,000 BC. Super pass.
Loren: Biggest takeaway from that trailer? Jonathan Pryce has a passing American accent.
Rick: There’s enough Oscar buzz around Glenn Close’s performance that I’ll give this a go.
We The Animals
Loren: Damn, talk about a coming of age flick. I don’t quite understand what’s happening here and I think that’s ok.
Rick: It’s like Beasts of the Southern Wild by way of Terrence Malick. Though it looks intense at points, I feel like I could kind of melt into this story. Count me in.
Billionaire Boys Club
Loren: It’s a bold move to release a movie with Kevin Spacey in it in 2018. Too bad, I like the rest of the cast. Otherwise this looks like Boiler Room but not as good.
Rick: I’m sure there was a contract stipulation that this get some kind of theatrical release, otherwise it could have died a quiet death on VOD (where it was released a month ago). Can’t blame the distributor for trying to get some of their money back, but I doubt this is going to fill anyone’s coffers.
The Little Mermaid
Loren: That trailer is awful. And those effects are like sub- CW in their quality. I think I’ll just wait for the Disney version coming soon.
Rick: I can’t knock the filmmakers for trying to mix the story up a bit. It definitely has potential, but this just does not look good.
Loren: Ethan Hawke says this is not a biopic. But it’s a movie about a real person’s life. That is the very definition of biopic. I had not heard of Blaze Foley before, I don’t know if I’ll see this to learn any more about him.
Rick: Is it okay that I don’t care about this story? Okay, cool. Because I super don’t.
Running For Grace
Loren: This… this movie is not for me. Glad they all got to take a Hawaiian vacation though.
Rick: I zoned out part way through that trailer. Clearly this is not a movie for me.
Dr. Brinks & Dr. Brinks
Loren: I feel like we’ve gotten this story before but this could be an interesting take on it. If it pops up again for me I’ll give it a shot but if it doesn’t I’ll most likely forget about it.
Rick: I chuckled a couple times, but I don’t know that I’ll remember this exists after today.
Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich
Loren: Aw, Thomas Lennon what are you doing in this?! Hey at least the gore gags look good. Otherwise this looks so damn silly. I’ll let Rick be the litmus test for this one. Maybe we’ll see it at a Horrorfest down the road.
Rick: It should come as no surprise that I have a soft spot for the Puppet Master movies. This is a reboot/loose remake of the first film, but looks more tongue-in-cheek than most of its predecessors. S. Craig Zahler (Bone Tomahawk, Riot in Cell Block 99) practically has a degree in writing ultraviolence, which this looks to deliver in spades. Bonus points for using practical effects. I’ll give it a go.
Memoir of War
Loren: I don’t really know what to say about this. Her performance looks great but I’m so burnt out on the subject matter.
Rick: Hiroshima, Mon Amour is heartbreaking, and I can’t imagine that story wasn’t at least partially informed by this experience. I’ll keep this on my radar.
Luis and the Aliens
Loren: Look, I get that animation isn’t easy, but maybe try a little? Besides looking cheap, it feels so by the numbers it’s not even funny. Maybe I’m missing something, but I doubt it.
Rick: Is…is this a remake of Spaced Invaders? Even if it isn’t, this looks like something you’d find in a gas station bargain DVD bin.
The Spy Gone North
Loren: I have enough Political Thrillers from our own country to watch before I get into others. That being said this is an interesting story that I might wiki to see how it turns out. I mean besides the part where a nuke doesn’t go off.
Rick: I enjoy me a good spy story, but I’m not feeling this one. *shrug*
Loren: First of all I didn’t see one damn naked Juliet in that whole trailer. Secondly, I don’t know if it’s just his face or whatever but I can’t help feel a little bad for Chris O’Dowd there. Not to say that their relationship is fine, it’s clearly not, but it’s just rubbing sand in the wound for it to be his idol that his wife leaves him for. That’s suicide material right there.
Rick: I enjoy all the people involved with this, but I can’t muster up any enthusiasm for it. I’m just not connecting with whimsical romance this week.
Loren: Well that looks ridiculous. I kinda want to see it.
Rick: I’m with Loren. This looks bananas. Count me in.
Down a Dark Hall
Loren: Yawn. PG-13 horror from the people that brought you Twilight. I’m all set.
Rick: Oh, look! A shitty rip-off of Suspiria! GFY, Summit.
Breaking and Exiting
Loren: This man directed this movie. That is all.
Rick: Well, I’d like to thank that trailer for giving away the entire movie. 10/10. Much appreciated.
Loren: How dare you movie, some people wanted to be in the spring musical. Can’t really catch a break this week. This looks like the most pedestrian non comedic little league movie out there.
Rick: Yeah. The lighthearted fare is just not landing with me this week.
The Package (Missed last week)
Loren: I can see why we skipped this last week. Sorry Netflix so far you’re 0-125,342 on your original comedy movies.
Rick: Oh, Jebus. So much yelling. I just…just stop it, movie. Just stop.
Loren: I’ll give this a shot on Matt Groening’s name alone. Plus the orchestral ‘Rebel, Rebel’ is pretty great.
Rick: Yep. I’m in for this.
To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before
Loren: At least Netflix’ romantic comedies seem to be doing ok. This looks cute enough. I don’t know that I’ll ever sit down and watch it, but if The Lady™ is into it maybe.
Rick: Things I am not the target audience for.
Lynyrd Skynyrd: If I Leave Here Tomorrow
Loren: Hell yeah, brother.
Rick: Eeeh. I like them, but I’m content with my level of Skynyrd knowledge. Also, I’m not springing for Showtime.
Insecure Season 3
Loren: I’m not watching this show but I feel like I should be. I always laugh at the trailers/clips I see.
Rick: Season 3 already? Crap. I’m never going to catch up on this.
So that’s your upcoming weekend in review. Let us know what you saw, liked and/or hated.
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–Loren and Rick