Weekend Watch – 08/09/19

Welcome to the Weekend Watch. Where we try to point you towards the best ways to spend your viewing time (or, at least, steer you clear of the garbage).

Movies

Wide Release

Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark

Loren: I dig it, it still looks like proper horror but done in a way that more people can enjoy it. Sign me up.

RDT: Never read the books, but this doesn’t look half bad. Horror at my speed, if you will.

Jen: Guillermo del Toro is not a bad pedigree for a horror movie. And scares without too much gore is sort of my butter zone for scary movies.

AJ: Awwww, I read these books when I was a kid. WHAT WAS I THINKING?!


Dora and the Lost City of Gold

Loren: I didn’t grow up with Dora so I have no attachment to the character, but I do appreciate that this has it’s tongue firmly planted in it’s cheek.

RDT: Is it creepy if I say this looks pretty good. I definitely won’t see it in the theaters, but I’ll check it out streaming.

Jen: A family movie?!?! I wish this came out when I was still in MA with my nieces and nephew, this looks like it would have pleased ages 5-whatever my true age is.

AJ: it’s the break-out roll Danny Trejo’s been waiting for!!! But seriously, that looks pretty adorable. If I had a kid, I’d be all in.


Brian Banks

Loren: I really do feel like these are stories that need to be told, but I’m really afraid we are just using them for financial gain and that feels really gross.

RDT: Really thought that said Briana Banks and was slightly disappointed it wasn’t.

Jen: I have conflicting feelings on this film – too much so to get into it here, but I probably won’t end up seeing it. Good to see Greg Kinnear in something not outright awful though, so good for him.

AJ: I am suffering from such a major news-fatigue right now. I don’t think I can handle this movie. It looks important and I wish it luck but I’m more in the mood to watch Pretty Woman for the 183rd time. 


The Kitchen

Loren: I have a real tough time with all three of these women sadly. Melissa McCarthy getting the least of it, especially when it’s in a serious role. Seeing as this isn’t getting any good buzz I think I can easily skip it.

RDT: Go read AJ’s thoughts. Widows was amazing. Give that a watch, please.

Jen: Widows, that was the name of it, thanks guys, that was bugging me. Yeah this looks a lot like that with more fun costumes and set design. I do love this cast but I think I’m good.

AJ: Boy I wish this movie was at a lot more than 14% on Rotten Tomatoes. The casting choices are so cool, the cast itself is amazing…. It just isn’t earning my interest. (And don’t slam me for not supporting women. And rent Widows instead – that movie was fucking amazing and got no love.)


Limited Release

The Peanut Butter Falcon

Loren: I smiled the whole time for that. I hope that maybe The Beef has gotten past his craziness and back into making decent movies.

RDT: I really wanted to hate that. But god-damned if it doesn’t look adorable. In.

Jen: Yep, I’m going to check this one out for sure.

AJ: I’m so programmed to roll my eyes at anything attached to Shia LaBeouf but dammit, this just looks delightful and charming and all feel-good-ish.


ECCO

Loren: I don’t know what’s happening but it has my attention.

RDT:          

Jen: This looks like just the sort of weird-o thing I’m into. I’ll check it out.

AJ: To borrow from Josh, “What did I just watch?!”


Wicked Witches

Loren: I dig the concept here but it looks so cheaply made. Maybe if we get a studio version of this that DOESN’T gut all the actual scares, but that’s never going to happen.

RDT: I very smartly read AJ’s thoughts before clicking the link to watch the trailer. I’m good, y’all.

Jen: Freaky. No.

AJ: I wish I liked scary movies. I’d have so many more choices. BRB, gotta change my pants…


Them That Follow

Loren: I would like to know more. One thing this trailer did though is make me wish that Olivia Coleman and Jim Gaffigan joined Walton Goggins and Kaitlyn Dever in another season of Justified.

RDT: 

Jen: I did not know Jim Gaffigan had it in him. Way to go, man.

AJ: Like I just said…. And btw, check out Jim Gaffigan making out-of-the-box choices, amiright?


The Tracker

Loren: You could honestly substitute any action star currently alive in that role and nothing would change. That’s a shame.

RDT: You know, Creed II is just as much a Rocky IV sequel as it is a Creed sequel. Definitely worth a watch.

Jen: I love me some Dolph Lundgren, but this is just every action movie ever made, right?

AJ: I think I saw this movie in the early 2000s starring Liam Neeson. Or in the early 90s starring Steven Seagal.


The Circus: Down the Road

Loren: First off, oof on the production value of not just the trailer (did you see that title card?) but also the whole production. Secondly I can get behind the acrobatics and the clowns etc of a circus but if you still have animals in your show you can get fucked.

RDT: Not a fan of circuses. So, if A = B and B = C then I don’t like circus documentaries either.

Jen: Speaking of the title card it made me think that we were about to witness a journey to hell.  “The Circus: Journey to Hell” is a sweet title for something. Do that, Hollywood.

AJ: You know, I actually find the doc’s hypothesis interesting but wish it had been made by a more prominent studio and handled by a bigger distributor — it could be a super fun doc. But it just looks too “indie” as is to watch for an hour and 40 minutes.


The Art of Racing in the Rain

Loren: I am a total animal guy and I just can’t with any of these movies. I’m good.

RDT: Dear god I want this movie to come out so I can stop seeing commercials for it on Hulu.

Jen: I just can’t with a dog voiceover. I just… can’t.

AJ: I can’t believe this is a limited release — I feel like I see an ad for it every eight minutes. But you won’t find me watching anything that probably involves a dog getting hurt or dying. I can’t do it. Old Yeller and “Where the Red Fern Grows” ruined me for life.


Socrates

Loren: It looks like a powerful performance but I know I’m never going to search this one out.

RDT: What AJ said.

Jen: What RDT said.

AJ: I will likely watch this instead:


Rapid Eye Movement

Loren: Hahaha. Dumb.

RDT: So dumb.

Jen: That trailer put me to sleep. Irony?

AJ:  I think I saw this movie in the early 2000s starring Colin Farell. Or in the early 90s starring Wesley Snipes.


Ode to Joy

Loren: I don’t even think this one paid them enough to make boat payments. This is like second car payments.

RDT: Wait… is that a real thing? Wait…… I don’t care.

Jen: This is too high concept by half. I’ll pass.

AJ: Can I just quote my favorite review I read of this movie? It’s so MEAN and it just made me laugh… “Ode to Joy is about a man with a disease that causes him to pass out whenever he experiences pleasure. He’d be safe seeing this movie.” (Read the rest here if you want though that sums it all up.)


TV/Streaming

NETFLIX

Wu Assassins

Loren: This looks dumb as hell but I’ll give anything with Iko Uwais a shot.

RDT: Woo!

Jen: Netflix really has something for everyone.

AJ: I agree with Loren — on the first part.


Glow Season 3

Loren: This show might be my favorite thing on “TV” right now. I can’t even express how excited I am for this season. Happy birthday to me.

RDT: Oh hell yeah. I’ll be done with this by the end of the weekend.

Jen: YES, YES, YES – I didn’t realize it was coming back yet and I’m so excited it caught me by surprise. Woo hoo!

AJ: I gotta finish Season Two but YES.


Sintonia

Loren: What’s a KondZilla?

RDT: No thank you.

Jen: I think I might be too old for this show.

AJ: That’s another pass for me.


HBO

My Favorite Shapes

Loren: I’ll give it a shot but that looks weird as hell.

RDT:

Jen: I don’t think I’ve acquired the taste, AJ.

AJ: Torres is definitely an acquired taste – not for everybody – but I may check this out. I think he’s pretty interesting.


Succession Season 2

Loren: I like the pedigree here but I don’t care about business Game of Thrones.

RDT: Didn’t care about season 1 and won’t care about this.

Jen: I saw a trailer for this before John Oliver the other day and said, aloud, I have no interest in this show. Sorry show.

AJ: I’ve heard good things but I’m only gonna get to this when I finish the 3000 other shows on the list.


AMAZON

Free Meek

Loren: It’s interesting that there’s kind of this true crime feel to a story about a celebrity.

RDT:

Jen: That looks both interesting, important, and well done – an unlikely, but highly sought after trilogy for a doc.

AJ: I only know vague things about this story but that’s a strong trailer. Maybe when I come out of my “I hate real life and the news” haze I’ll check it out.


So that’s your upcoming weekend in review. Let us know what you saw, liked and/or hated.

As always, you can find us on Facebook at facebook.com/hollywoodpicturenews, Instagram at instagram.com/hollywoodpicturenews, or @HWPicNews on Twitter. And send in your questions/comments to questions@hollywoodpicturenews.com.

From Hollywood,
–Loren, RDT, Jen, and AJ

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