Welcome to the Weekend Watch. Where we try to point you towards the best ways to spend your viewing time (or, at least, steer you clear of the garbage).
Loren: RyanReynoldsButWhy.gif. Also, I had forgotten how fucked up that premise is. If I’m super bored some afternoon maybe, but I’m not putting any effort into this.
Rick: Super nope.
The Lady™: Nooooo thanks! There are so many things wrong with the premise of this film, I can barely get past the trailer. I’ll rewatch the original and blissfully ignore all the problems in that one.
Jen: Was anyone asking for this movie? I mean, it’s fine, just… unnecessary.
Loren: I am definitely not the target demo for this movie.
Rick: I’m probably not the target demo, but I’ve been looking forward to this one.
The Lady™: This looks really great, but also kind of emotionally traumatizing? It might hit a little too close to home for me, and I don’t even have kids!
Jen: I am definitely the target demo for this movie. It hurts my whole body every time I see that breast milk spill.
Loren: Ruth Bader Ginsburg is a badass. I will add this directly to my queue the moment it hits Netflix.
Rick: RBG FTW.
The Lady™: ZOMFG, she’s so tiny and SO amazing!!
RBG for President! RBG for Pope! RBG for my adopted grandmother!
Uncle: My Dad’s Friend
Loren: All I could find was this 30 second teaser, but I think that’s enough. This is a movie that looks weird, but not weird enough to get me to search it out.
Rick: I found a real trailer, but it lacked subtitles. The jist of it seems to be that the titular Uncle appears to be super nice, but is actually a nefarious dude. There may or may not be kidnapping and/or murder involved. Regardless, I’m out.
The Lady™: I imagine it’s just 90 minutes of a guy strolling through a golf course, intercut with a Pantene ad.
Jen: Ummmmm, I’m good thanks.
Loren: At first I was kinda meh, but the creature FX work sucked me in. I will totally watch this streaming.
Rick: I remember reading about this after it screened at Fantasia (under its original title,‘The Master Cleanse’). It hits all the marks for me: weird, creepy, good cast, and actual creature effects. I’m in.
The Lady™: I’m so torn!! My distaste for Johnny Galecki is strong, but my love for Angelica Houston is stronger. Couple that with how weird this looks, and I think I’m actually in.
Jen: I surprised myself by liking this trailer. I hope it lives up to the fun, quirky vibe of the trailer.
The Trough (低压槽)
Loren: I hope this is good, it looks like a cool Neo-Hong Kong Actioner but the visual FX are fairly lacking.
Rick: This washed out, kind of blue-tinged look seems to permeate nearly every HK action movie that’s come out in the last few years; even ones that are period. Can’t say I’m a fan. This looks fine, but pretty run of the mill for a HK gangster movie. Call it a maybe.
The Lady™: If it’s good, I’ll catch a viewing someday at Rick’s house.
Jen: This actually doesn’t look bad, but there’s about a zero percent chance I actually see this.
Loren: Damn. For being such a good guy David Tennant sure plays a great sonofabitch. It has some pretty great classic thriller elements to it. If this gets good word, I’ll keep it on my radar.
Jen: David Tennant can tie me up in his office anytime.
Loren: Woof. I wish people would stop shooting movies on their phones. Also, the domestic violence is a little much. Pass.
The Lady™: Yeah, I think I’m all set. Hard pass.
Jen: At 48 seconds, nobody throws a plate like that. I watched it like 10 times and it got weirder each time. No.
102 Not Out
Loren: This could be a lot of fun but Old People make me a little sad. Like, I’m old, and that makes me sad.
Rick: Sorry. I got halfway through the trailer and stopped watching. I tried, but I have zero interest in this movie.
The Lady™: Looks cute, and gives me hope that I can grow old AND be quirky. But there’s a -10% chance of me ever seeing this.
Jen: Loren, I can attest, you are not old. That’s all I’ve got. This is a cute premise though, I’ll never see it, but I like the idea of it.
John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous at Radio City
Loren: Netflix didn’t release a trailer for this but please enjoy this bit he did on Colbert during the tour. Mulaney is The Lady™ and I’s favorite comic and we’ve been looking forward to this one for a while now. When the tour came through LA last year we jumped at getting tickets and after an evening laughing our faces off we came to the realization that somewhere along the way this would have been taped for a Netflix Special. And here we are. So very excited.
The Lady™: ^what Loren said^
Jen: 100% I cannot wait!
Loren: I like that Netflix is going full on into making these Neo-Noir Cyberpunk flicks. This seems more bleak future than Blade Runner or Altered Carbon but still looks like a fun subdivision of the genre. The only problem I see is that Netflix’ movies have been more miss than hit, so I’ll wait to hear reviews.
Rick: I’m always willing to give an Andrew Niccol movie a try. Hell, I even watched that tween sci-fi flick The Host because he adapted/directed it.
A. Facebook: The Movie!
B. This is clearly a video game, not a show.
C. Should I get bangs?
Jen: I really like the idea of this, but there’s that nagging feeling in the back of my head that it will be utter crap. I’ll be waiting with Loren for the reviews on this one before I invest my time.
Dany De Boon Des Hauts De France
Loren: You guys know I love Stand-Up Comedy (see above) but it’s really hard to get into when it’s not in the language you speak fluently. This is a maybe from me.
Rick: *additional shrug*
The Lady™: My friend Katie lives in France. I’ll ask her if it’s funny.
Jen: I’m guessing they love this guy in France and good for them. I’ll stick to my ‘Merican comedy, thanks.
Loren: I’m not sure that I want to sit there and confront my own mortality, or the mortality of my loved ones. There are so many other docs on Netflix that I’ll watch before I throw this one on, no matter how well it’s done.
Rick: I’m emotionally unprepared for this subject matter.
The Lady™: This hurt my soul a bit. What Loren, Rick, and Jen said: I’m just not ready for this.
Jen: What Loren said.
Forgive Us Our Debts
Loren: Who knew Italian Debt Collectors were so terrifying. Italians, probably.
Rick: Ehh. Looks too predictable. Pass.
The Lady™: *insert cliche debt joke here*
Jen: Hmm and I thought the phone calls were bad.
A Little Help With Carol Burnett
Loren: The jokes might be easy but, god dammit, I love Carol Burnett. I’ll definitely give this a few episodes.
Rick: It’s hard to say ‘no’ to Carol Burnett.
The Lady™: You had me at Carol Burnett. I didn’t even need to watch the trailer, but I’m certainly glad I did!!
Jen: I chuckled a fair bit at the Dolly Parton line and I can’t say no to Carol Burnett, I’m in for this one.
Loren: It’s got a definite zombie movie feel minus the zombies, but plus a little Cabin Fever. I’m not sure I’ll ever get around to it but it looks promising.
Rick: Can we cancel the apocalypse? I’m more than a little weary of it.
The Lady™: Netflix has surprised me more than once with their foreign produced dramas. I loved 3%, I more than adored Travelers. I’ll give this a shot. Hoping I’m pleasantly surprised again.
Jen: This feels like a lot of other post-virus movies and that’s fine, but nothing jumped out at me making me want to tune in.
Loren: I love when Netflix brings TV from other cultures to us. This looks like it could be a lot of fun. Maybe it’ll do well enough that we can get an American version of it going.
Rick: This trailer made my headache worse. Thanks but no thanks, wacky Korean reality-ish show.
Jen: This looks fantastic – I see a binge watch in my future.
I’m Dying Up Here Season 2
Loren: I meant to watch season 1 and then didn’t. I think I may fix that at some point and then hopefully roll right into season 2.
Rick: Missed the first season, have no intention of starting it.
The Lady™: How did I miss this?! Excuse me, I need to immediately binge Season 1…
Jen: Weird that a show about comedy can be so tragic. Deep, man.
2018 Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony
Loren: This definitely seems like a better concert to go to than to watch on TV. But then you have to go to Cleveland. Tough.
Rick: *third time’s a shrug*
The Lady™: I would’ve assumed all these bands had already been inducted. Congrats to them. Call me when it’s The Cure.
Jen: None of these acts are blowing my skirt up but I’m sure there’s some great performances in there, it’s worth a watch I think.
Loren: Not having Starz puts an obvious strain on me seeing this. It looks like a pretty good and realistic look on the “Fresh Off The Boat” trope. If it gets good reviews maybe I’ll search it out.
Rick: I lack Starz. Also, the desire to watch this show.
The Lady™: This is my life. Am I gonna watch it? Yeah. Am I gonna be pissed she described a wine as “sweet, sour, salty, bitter”? HELL YEAH.
Jen: I like wine and sex. And I have a Starz password.
Loren: An interesting view into how other cultures view homosexuality that I’m probably never going to watch.
Rick: This will likely do well. Definitely an underrepresented group in any kind of entertainment. I doubt I’ll get around to it, though.
The Lady™: *sigh* I miss The L Word.
Jen: I’m agreeing with Loren a lot this week. See above.
So that’s your upcoming weekend in review. Let us know what you saw, liked and/or hated.
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–Loren, Rick, The Lady™, and Jen